Meh.

First things first, this whole LOVE  thing isn’t working out for me. I’ve decided that I’m not going to let myself have feelings for anyone because I always end up getting hurt as a result of caring too much.

The SI Project is going pretty well. It’s moving slow, but that’s expected because of how new this is still. I’m really excited about the things we’re doing with this, though. One of the co founders is going to be running a youtube part of the project, which should attract a whole different crowd.

I wanted to SH so bad last night that it physically hurt. I wanted relief so bad.

But I didn’t do a damn thing but listen to music and cry.  I’ve come way to far to let that take over. This morning I woke up and I felt a little lighter, like some sort of weight was lifted off of my shoulders. I feel like I’ll only have to overcome this urge a few more times and than I’ll no longer have it. 

I can do this, right?

Recovery here we come.

– Amy

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9 thoughts on “Meh.

  1. Clicks the ‘Like’ button to show support.

    I think you were very strong not to SH. I can only imagine how much effort it takes when you just want to block some things out and that feels like the only way … but … I hope you are correct and just a few more times will start to make it easier.

    Because I think, ‘yes’…you can do this. Wants you to stop feeling pain and to have you one day tell others, “this was me … but not anymore … perhaps I can help you …”

    *huggggs* Always keep trying…

    Like

      1. I read the comments/responses between you and Amber …. and *huggss*.

        First that. The hug. So you know that you matter. Always you matter ok.

        And … nods on the hardness …and I think knowing it is so hard…makes you that much more of a fighter.

        Like

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