Stay Strong

Today at school I almost broke down crying.

I felt like crap, was forced to go to my moms house, realized I’ve gotten so antisocial that everyone thinks I’m quiet and shy.

I don’t want to be like this. I want my old self back. The one that was exciting, loud, funny, and always knew what to say. Now I’m to swallowed up in school and life that I can’t even make time for the people I love.

I’m a disaster.

But, on the bright side, my wrists have been clean through this whole situation. Someone promised me that they wouldn’t make me tell my parents if I never did it again, and I promised them I wouldn’t let them down.

I know that doesn’t fix anything, I’m smarter than that.

And just a few more days for the results…

– Amy


12 thoughts on “Stay Strong

  1. Amy, try this when that need arises, if you can’t shake it. suck on a lemon. not just for a moment, but long enough for it to replace the need, to cut. even salt.. and don’t swallow it. yuck. :-) it works well for some people. Or an ice cube, not to eat, but use it instead of something sharp. (please)

    But I am happy you have been able to keep that promise. It is truly wonderful.

    crying is ok you know, it lets frustration out, but you usually feel bad afterwards.

    *sneaks a hug*


    1. Amy

      I never feel the need to cut anymore. I realized its a horrible way to deal with things and even cringe now when I think of someone else doing that to themselves. I just hold all of my anger and sadness in, even though that’s not to much better. I don’t have time to cope with it so I just kinda keep everything inside.
      And I’m almost unable to cry at this point. It’s become such a habit to hold it in that i can’t even do it anymore.
      *hugs back*


    1. Amy

      I’ve been clean for months now:)
      Not really… we barley talk… even if we need to do something or go somewhere we don’t talk. We just mentally communicate. But not on this level.


      1. maybe you should give him a try. sit him down and tell him you need some help, you want to unwind a bit. He sounds terrific, I think he may surprise you. If you mentally communicate with him, it is a sign you are close. tell him you are serious.


  2. Danielle Gosline

    Amy, I’m always here if you need to talk :) You have my number, so if you ever need anything just text/call me. I know we haven’t talked for awhile, but I still care about you! I miss you, stay strong! Love you girly! <3


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