A Message To All of Skonecki’s New Students

This is a message to all of Skonecki’s incoming students.

To start off, I sincerely feel bad for you. Seriously. I guess I can try to give you tips on how to survive his class and make it a full year with him, but you can’t. He changes you. Your mental state will forever be changed.

  • -Don’t make fun of his baldness. He feeds on it, then pukes it up on you guys in the form of sarcasm.
  • -He’ll teach you that you can play dirty, but don’t get caught. Which basically means you can do whatever you want, but if you get caught breaking the rules, he’ll claim he knew nothing about what you were doing.
  • -Also, watch what you put on your blogs. He reads it, and so do your classmates and the rest of the world. It’s open for anyone and everyone to see.
  • -If you do the planet walk, don’t pick Uranus for obvious reasons, be sure to snag something like Mars or Earth or the Sun, because if you pick a planet that farthest from the Sun, you’ll be doing a lot of walking. Unless, of course, you can get lucky and switch with someone halfway like I did.
  • -Do not start mosh pits, throw oranges at each other, or silly string him as an end-of-the-year prank. Last year we silly stringed him the best, so accept your loss already. Plus I think he’s allergic to it or something…
  • -Don’t be afraid to talk to him about stuff. Even though you think he’s just a teacher who could care less about whats going on at home, he cares. Tell him if your having problems in class. He needs to know and understand. But be prepared to be made fun of for it. He can’t help himself, he has no filter.
  • -Last year, I hated when people in my class would try to be funny and say “because he has no life.” or “… because his wife beats him at home.” Don’t say things like that. They are disrespectful, make you look small minded, and are completely overused insults. It’s also insulting you. Of course he has no life. He’s spending his time dealing with a room full of annoying children all day. He could be doing better things, but instead he chose to drill useful knowledge into your brain. Respect him.
  • -Seriously, do your homework and take notes. It helps. Because once you’re in highschool, they expect you to know the same crap, and start teaching you stuff that builds on it. My notes from eighth grade have saved me so many times this year and it’s only been three weeks.
  • -Don’t get caught up in proxy bypass sites. You will get caught by people who have more authority than Skonecki. Skonecki really doesn’t care that much, but once he gets a call or an email saying that one of his students was on Facebook or Youtube in class, he’ll be forced to deactivate your MPS login.

So, yeah. That’s all of the advice I can give you for eighth grade. I’ll probably think of more stuff later, but then I’ll forget it again anyways, so it doesn’t matter.

Oh yeah…
Can you people do me a favor?

Everyone pick a day to sit at your desk in his class, ignore him, and pick at your split ends. Just do it. Don’t  question it.


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